Under the shade of the banyan tree
Thinking back to my growing up years, whenever I meet a stranger or meet one of my parent’s friends at a store or the library or somewhere around, I always introduced myself as, V – daughter of so and so and it was my identity. And immediately the uncle or aunty to who I was introducing myself would warm up and add so you are Prof.SN’s granddaughter! I was blessed with a famous and well-recoganized grandfather. And I used it to my advantage many a times.
It has been a negative at times too. I remember this incident in college, I was having an oral examination at one of my civil engineering labs and I was unable to answer some question and hence was blabbering nonsense to get away and my examiner goes sarcastically, “so you are Prof.SN’s granddaughter and you don’t know this answer” (well just coz my grandfather was the expert on the topic I cannot be expected to be the same!)
I even remember an incidence when someone told me I should stop calling myself Prof. SN’s grandaughter as I was then a grand old age of 18 and it was time I stopped living under the shade of the banyan tree – my grandfather. And I told the person (a much-older and much-respectable person) that I was just a branch of the tree and I can never survive without being connected to the root. I was proud to be identified as so and so’s granddaughter and daughter! It was my luck I had these people in my life and I will never be ashamed to admit that I am their off-spring.
Till the past 3-4 years, I always was so and so daughter and Prof.SN’s granddaughter. And then suddenly I was in a new country establishing my own identity. Today I introduce myself, as V – no references. People know me as me. I was considered grown-up. And today I just introduce myself as V and if I meet one of R’s friends, I add I am R’s wife. The change never occured to me till last Friday. It is one of those things in life that just happen and you never realize it happens.
Last Friday, I just finish my rehersal for my big program on Saturday and one of my dance friend’s dad comes up and says, “you don’t know me, but you are so and so’s daughter and Prof.SN’s granddaughter”! I was speechless, yes after years I heard those magical words. I did recover enough to find out more details and learned that my mother and my friend’s dad were schoolmates. But what stayed with me was the way he addressed me! I brought back memories and happiness!
Might be I live under the shade of the banyan tree as that person once said but I am so grateful I have that shade. And I am glad I am not a weary traveler lost in the desert of life searching for the shade! I am just one of those lucky ones to be born under shade or as I say to be a part of that massive banyan tree!
Lavs
February 6, 2008 at 5:11 pmA tag is waiting for you at my space:-)