For days news of the Mumbai attack has been filling every nook and corner. I tried to stay away from it. I did not want more information. I did not want to hear more about 19 yr old fake Versace clad boys with AK-47s. I did not want to hear about the 100 yr old Taj burning. I did not want to see images of innocent people lying dead. I did not want to hear the wails of sorrow filling the air. I did not want to hear the politicians make a mess. I just acted as if I did not care. Odd it may sound to everyone. You might say, I am selfish or I have a heart of stone. But it is just not that. It is depressing.

Various emotions and feelings engulfed me the minute I heard the news. It was shock, fear, and finally anger. More angry than I had ever been. Anger leads to nowhere productive so I tried to take calming gulps of air and focus my pent-up energy elsewhere. I tried to put Mumbai off my mind. Like millions of other Indians, I live miles away and there is basically nothing I can do than sit and watch. Watch the drama unfold and I just decided I had enough. I decided I did not want to know what happened or what was said. I shut down to information. I let the anger seep out of my body and mind. Or I tried to do it. For 3 days, I tried and I gave up today. I have been spending hours reading anything I could lay my hands on about the Mumbai terror attacks. My heart goes out for the lost lives. I am still angry… I feel helpless