I am sure everyone is wondering how we are in December 2020 already? Where did the year go? What about those plans, dreams and unresolved conflicts? What about our jobs, our schools and our health?

I am there – in the same storm trying to survive like the next person. For sure I am privileged and lucky enough to be navigating this storm in my super deluxe yacht. I get to enjoy the journey along the way. I am not bailing out water and trying to move forward at the same time.

For sure, I have my gripes and sour notes. But 2020 has been a lesson in resilience and I am in so many ways grateful for the doors this year opened for me. Like most Decembers, I will be spending time this month, reflecting, clearing the cobwebs and making plans for 2021. The plans that I almost always throw out as life throws curveballs. But the plans I like to make knowing I will never get to them..

December gets heavy – especially December 2020. It carries the weight of all the baggage that didn’t get checked-in for those trips that never happened. It carries all the love and gifts, I picked out with care for friends and family. It lingers uncomfortably in my mouth, that medicinal taste, I would love to wash away.

Looking back into 2020 is hard – harder than it has been previously. Dissecting pieces of me and putting them under the harsh lights and the microscope is never easy. It is uncomfortable and scary. But I did it. It is a process that I was comfortable sharing in this space years ago. But as I grew wary of the world, I kept it away from my blog and I also kept myself away from the blog. (Fun fact: My 2019 reflections were written on paper and sand and washed away by the waters of the Strait of Malacca.)

Dissecting 2020 will be harder but I am going to share pieces of my reflection here in the days to come. Writing it out gets me feel lighter and even optimistic. Knowing that these words are just some words on the internet without critical eyes on it, makes it easier.

While I am completely aware, January 1st commercially packaged and marketed for years, I still like the opportunity and the belief that January 1st heralds. A reminder and another chance to get it right.

Here is to hope and resilience. And to those heroes who kept my 2020 going.

December 2020 may not have all the thrills and frills of December 2019, but it will still be one filled with small rituals and optimism.