*Update: The surgery went well. Thanks for all who called me/pinged me/messaged me and left comments*

I were more religious. Sometimes like NOW.

I used to be religious but over the years I stopped. I have no reason why I stopped. I became more spiritual I guess. I stopped asking God for favors. I felt petty asking things. I felt my problems were small and insignificant. I have accepted it as a part of me and moved on.

Then there are moments – helpless moments like when you hear your granny needs surgery and is in pain. I wish I had someone to dump all my pain and fear on. I know I should be counting my blessings. She is at the hospital and the diagnosis was made on time.

I feel helpless. I feel lost. I wish I could pray. I wish I believed in the power of prayers like my granny does.

I look out of the window as the tears fall. Lighting flashes. I wish I were the kind who believed in signs. Maybe it is a sign everything will be better?

Fingers crossed and tears on my eyes.