This post is related to this no-so-old post of mine.

I have this strange habit or is it a feeling or is it a happening? I am not sure how to describe it but I somehow get into any book I read. No I do not mean I feel what the heroine or any other character in the book feels because I am involved with the book but instead I get the overall mood of the chapter I am reading. Like if I read a not-so-happy chapter, my mood reflects it. It is something I cannot shake off. I cannot keep the book off me. I cannot view the book as a book and a work of fiction as a work of fiction. Instead, I bring it on to my day-to-day life and in short it depresses me. Anything with a shade of gray makes my day gray. It does not have to be a horror story or a sad ending. It is just anything with a little bit of drama or sadness.

For example, I am reading the Twilight series now. I really did not want to read it as I knew it would have this effect on me but I saw it at a friend’s place and borrowed it. And the past week I have been battling a mild depression. As you probably know, the Twilight series is not a depressing read. Instead it is just a romantic story with vampires and werewolves thrown in. But it affects me or rather I let it affect me personally and deeply. It makes me sad, weep uncontrollably, and in general a mild depressed state is what I am in right now. The problem is, I know what the book is doing to me but I want to know the end. How crazy am I? I kind of inflict this on myself.

I realized what books do to me or what I let books to me a few years back. it was quite a startling revelation to me. It was one of those things I did not know about me. I stopped haunting the best seller list and gave up my goals to read fiction best sellers and stick to chick-lit and it made a world of difference. I was happy and life was normal but now it is not so. But I want to finish this book. I am at the last book and I am spending all my time reading it so that I can put it away and with it my depression.

The depression puts me in unease. It brings to light feelings of guilt, sadness, pain and regret. No human is without them. I know all these feelings are a part and parcel of life but facing all of them at once when your mood is sort of whacky does not help. It has been hellish but I want to complete it.

btw, I was surprised to find a Wiki page on Chick-lit.