I am already dreaming about my next destination. I know our time in Gladstone is limited and destination next is a mystery. It could be anywhere in the world. I often wonder where we will end up next and dream about the experiences the new place will bring us.

At one level it amazes me to even think about moving when I have barely settled in. But that is me. I need to travel, to explore and wander. I have friends who are amazed at the fluidity our lives have. The shapes and forms we seem to take. The accents and experiences we pick up. It never ceases to amaze me either. The best part of moving is the experience and the thrill.

The worst part of being a gypsy is missing friends and friendships that fall apart. I have been in Gladstone for nearly 3 months and I do not have a friend here – someone to gossip with and laugh with. I do not think I will make a friend here and to be honest I am not even trying to make friends.

I have some friends from Singapore who I am in touch with but those friends came into my life towards the end of my days in Singapore and I regret not meeting them earlier. Houston is a total different story. I lived there for 7+ years and had a great network of friends and well-wishers. I miss them the most.

It is easy to say that in today’s digital age it is easy to connect with friends. Yes I agree but there are those moments you want to share something and you realize your friend is asleep and will not check his/her message till the next day is frustrating. Some news deserve to be shared immediately. I am lucky – I have friends from India, Houston and Singapore who are still connected to me via Whatsapp and IMessage. They are my cheerleaders and support system. But I miss being able to sit down and talk over a cuppa.

And then there are those relationships that thrived because of the regular coffee and lunch/classroom meetups. Relationships that were limited to specific locations and relationships that died because I moved away. I miss them more than I would like. More than I thought I would. To be honest, I cry over those lost relationships at times. It is a lonely life at times.

I connect with numerous people on social media every single day. I make an effort to stay connected but I miss the real personal connections. I meet people, I smile, I make small talk but it is no substitute for the relationships that were built over the years.

There are days when my only adult interactions are with my daughter’s teachers and cashiers at the local supermarket. I get frustrated and lost. I get depressed. I message a friend who will understand me, the friend is in a totally different timezone and does not respond. I could feel the depression settling in. The sunshine fading. I shake myself and try to create my own sunshine.

Now I have bared my soul and shared my dark secret. My life in Gladstone is not always sunshine, blue skies and white puffy clouds. It does have its grey days. I try not to dwell on those grey days too much. I move on.